Books. Whee!

You have received this note because someone thinks you are a literary geek. Copy the questions into your own note, answer the questions, and tag any friends who would appreciate the quiz, including the person who sent you this. Don't bother trying to italicize your book titles. We know you want to.
NB: I’m only going to answer these questions about books for entertainment -- and leave out scholarly and/or religious books for the most part.

1) What author do you own the most books by?

Without going and counting I would guess Bodie Thoene… She writes historical fiction that I was absolutely hooked on from the time I was 11 until I was about 15. Or possibly Gertrude Chandler Warner – I was a big Boxcar Children reader in elementary and middle school.

2) What book do you own the most copies of?

I think I have 5 Bibles, 1 study Bible, 1 random little Bible with no back cover, 1 that my brother gave me for Christmas when I was 12, and 2 audio Bibles on my iPod (different narrators) – all KJV.
3) Did it bother you that both those questions ended with prepositions?
I didn’t even notice. You know what I notice though? When someone says your when they mean to say you’re. I hate that.

4) What fictional character are you secretly in love with?

Sherlock Holmes. A genius: violinist, boxer, chemist, author, actor, sharp shooter, spy master, martial artist, beekeeper, swordsman, and the best in the world at what he does. I like to think that if he met me, he would forget Irene Adler, and give up the cocaine.

There hasn’t been a single movie, play, or TV show that I’ve seen that really captures the flavor of Holmes the way I see him in my head. – the man in the book wasn’t a hoity-toity, detached, intellectual in a deer-stalker hat. He was a gritty Victorian-era detective with a background of physical prowess. He was able to move undetected among the lowlife underbelly of London’s toughest crime rings. If we’re comparing him to other fictional detectives, he’s got much more in common with Batman than Adrian Monk or Hercule Piorot.

5) What book have you read the most times in your life (excluding picture books read to children; i.e., Goodnight Moon does not count).

Dude – you’re (not your) talking to an extreme book re-reader – if I like a book I’m liable to read it 3 times just for kicks and giggles. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve read Little Women. I can pick that book up and flip to any point in the story and just start reading. It’s like comfort food for the heart.

6) What was your favorite book when you were ten years old?
See Above.

7) What is the worst book you've read in the past year?

Calculating God – Could Not (would not) Finish It – rubbish in every sense.

8) What is the best book you've read in the past year?
Maybe The Road by Cormac McCarthy

9) If you could force everyone you tagged to read one book, what would it be?

Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things --- fascinating, fun, and hilarious.

10) Who deserves to win the next Nobel Prize for Literature?

Oh man… I’m going to agree with Jason on this one, and say Marilynne Robinson. After I read her books I feel a sort of despair that I’ll ever accomplish anything in my life as close to perfection.

11) What book would you most like to see made into a movie?

Bitter is the New Black by Jen Lancaster.

12) What book would you least like to see made into a movie?

I pretty much hate when they make my favorite books into movies – they’re almost NEVER as good, and I already have my own ideas about what a character/scene looks like. (See: Sherlock Holmes)

13) Describe your weirdest dream involving a writer, book, or literary character.

A few years ago I had several dreams where I was in love with Steve Urkel, or where I was Steve Urkel... he’s not a literary character, but I still thought I’d share.

14) What is the most lowbrow book you've read as an adult?

Probably “The Little Lady Agency” by Hester Brown – I don’t really read a lot of chick-lit, but this was wonderful fluffy fun and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

15) What is the most difficult book you've ever read?

Unabridged Les Miserables -- do we really need 200 pages on the Paris sewer system?
Plato’s Republic

16) What is the most obscure Shakespeare play you've seen?

The Merry Wives of Windsor – not really obscure, but the best I can do. It was great fun.

17) Do you prefer the French or the Russians?

French. It’s much more fun to spend an afternoon with d’Artagnan then Ivan Denisovich. Maybe not so thought provoking, but a lot more fun.

18) Roth or Updike?

I haven’t read any Roth…

19) David Sedaris or Dave Eggers?

Sedaris... I think Eggers is really one of the most talented writers of my generation so far, but he can be so hard to read – I have yet to finish What is the What because I was so depressed. Sedaris is always fun.

20) Shakespeare, Milton, or Chaucer?

Shakespeare. I’m trying to read one work of Shakespeare a month – I figure eventually I’ll get through everything, and feel like I’ve accomplished something.

21) Austen or Eliot?

Austen. I have a hard time caring about anything I’ve read of Eliot’s.

22) What is the biggest or most embarrassing gap in your reading?

Mostly, I wish I had more serious scholarly books under my belt – especially theology and philosophy.

23) What is your favorite novel?
Jane Eyre? Swiss Family Robinson? Little Women? Gilead? The Count of Monte Cristo? I hate this question.

24) Play?
The Importance of Being Ernest – or anything else by Wilde.

25) Poem?

A Mile With Me by Henry Van Dyke. Not the best poem I’ve ever read, but one that always resonates with me.

While we’re on the subject… To all you Aspiring Poets out there: I am of the opinion that there is almost never an excuse for a poem to run for more than 10 stanzas – so please don’t afflict me with 4 pages of raptures on your angst, your lover, or the flowers in spring.

Also – usually if its good poetry it has RYHME AND/OR METER – if you’re confused about what either of those words mean then what you’re writing probably isn’t poetry. Punctuation, spelling, and capitalization do count (damn you e.e. cummings! You made every grammatically challenged lovelorn teenager in the world believe that they don’t need no stinkin’ grammar to write no stinkin’ poem). If your poem is good it probably includes the liberal use of metaphors, similes, and/or anthropomorphic imagery – it is poetry. Poetry does not equal prose + line breaks.

It shouldn’t require intuitive leaps of logic for the reader to understand what the heck the “poet” is talking about. A good poem should EXPRESS something TRUE in a BEAUTIFUL way. When you read a poem you should think, “That is true. I wish I could have said that so well.” Or, “That is beautiful. I wish I could have expressed it so truly.”

End of Rant.

26) Essay?

Essays are one of my absolute favorite forms of literature. Sarah Vowell, Seneca, David Sedaris, David Foster Wallace, Robert Louis Stevenson, Sloane Crosby, Mark Twain, Samuel Johnson, Norah Ephron…if you haven’t read them, you need to start. I’m not picking a favorite essay – but my favorite book of essays is The Art of the Personal Essay compiled by Philip Lopate.

Even if you don’t have time to read, you can find time to read an essay – and feel better for doing so.

27) Short story?

I haven’t read a lot of short stories really – except in school. I feel like if you have an idea that’s good enough to last for 30 pages and make me care about the characters, you might as well make it the first chapter in a book. (example: Ender’s Game – started as a short story, but was really a much much better book)

28) Work of nonfiction?

A Severe Mercy by Shelden VanAucken. Read it.

29) Who is your favorite writer?

I am awed by the force and subtle beauty of Marilynne Robinson’s work. I laugh so hard I snort when I read a Jen Lancaster memoir. Charlotte Bronte addresses themes of passion and morality in her novels that strike me where I live. The sonnets of Elizabeth Barrett Browning are probably the finest ever written in the English language. Too many authors of too many different types of books have formed my mind for me to pick just one: I hate this question too.

30) Who is the most overrated writer alive today?

Rhonda Byrne --- I’m sorry but the Secret is a load of hogwash. Poorly written, overly hyped, bad, wrong-headed, hogwash. There is no way on earth that anything that flowed from this woman’s pen deserves 5 bazillion years as the NY Times number one best seller. 50 bajillion dollars have been spent on this book – those dollars could have been spent on good books and that makes me sad.

31) What is your desert island book?

If you’re (not your) talking about for pure entertainment (as opposed to edification or information) purposes, then it would have to be a large brick of a book, but one that didn’t have a sequel. Something like The Count of Monte Cristo … or maybe something funny like a book of essays--- waaaay too hard to choose, yet they always ask this question.

2) And... what are you reading right now?
Glitz by Elmore Leonard
King Lear - Shakespeare

_originally posted on fb 4/7/09_